There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
