I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
