Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
