so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
