if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
