i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
