sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
