we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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