I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
