I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
