she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize