nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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