I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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