i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
