no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize