Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize