omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
