wrigley field is MILF paradise
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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