I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
