You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize