Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Randomize
