i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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