Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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