I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
