Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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