I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
