I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
