...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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