Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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