They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
