Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
