No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
