I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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