grandma shit on top of the toilet
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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