we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
