just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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