are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize