I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize