i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
