i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
