Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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