trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It's never too late to be topless.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize