You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
It's Friday. Sex?
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
