Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize