i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I am one with the molecules
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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