If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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