Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
