Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize