He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
