I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
