if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
